The Gender Spectrum

Like many things in life these days, gender isn't as black and white as it once seemed. For many people gender can be a very fluid thing, and can be seen as a spectrum in which some don't fall entirely at one end or the other, or can move freely throughout. The term "genderqueer" is most commonly used for those who don't identify fully as male or female (I considered myself genderqueer at one stage). This can mean any number of things, switching genders on different days, identifying as both genders at once, neither gender, or having traits seen as masculine or feminine but not being strictly male or female.

There are so many possibilities when it comes to gender that it's impossible to come up with terms for all of them. The best thing to do is just to think of gender as fluid and try not impose labels on anyone who doesn't want them. If you're worried about pronouns and names, just ask in private or use gender neutral terms.

Once again, any further input is welcome :)

Going Stealth

A situation sometimes known as "going stealth" is where a Trans person doesn't wish for their past (as the opposite sex) or recent life (as a Trans person) to be known at all. This means they no longer want to be known as anything other than the gender they identify as. Obviously to some this is subject to the amount the person passes (looks/acts like their preferred gender) but it is still entirely up to them whether they would like to go stealth or not.

As a friend or relative of anyone in this situation it is your duty to never reveal anything they don't want to anybody else. If you're introducing them to friends, or at a party, never bring up their past as the opposite sex, and make no mention of them being Trans. You have to respect their wishes as you would anybody else who entrusted you with a secret, as it can be life shattering to some people to be "outed".

Contrary to what movies and tv shows would have you believe, Trans people do not go stealth in order to trick Cis men/women into having sex with them, or any other kind of nefarious or deviant crap. They do it because they simply wish to be seen by everyone else as the gender that they see themselves as. All you have to do is respect that and treat them as you would anyone else.

As I'm not "going stealth" myself I obviously don't know everything about the situation these people find themselves in. If there is anything that anyone would like to add, go right ahead. The more info on the subject the better.

Trans issues, myths facts and more

Starting today I will occasionally be posting about Trans issues, myths, facts etc to give a better insight into the Trans community. I am not making the assumption that any of you know nothing about being Trans or trying to force any kind of agenda on you. This is more for people who would like to know more but don't know how to (or are a little scared to) ask me about such things. There will be some posts about misconceptions that anger me, but for the most part I hope to just shed some light on the facts, or issues that affect the community.

Keep in mind I'm not above making mistakes and getting things wrong myself, as I'm still fairly new to the whole Trans thing myself. For starters some people will get very offended if you don't use the most up-to-date correct terms that exists, I'm not one of those people. For some, the term Trans must have an asterix after it (Trans*) but given there are far bigger issues to worry about, I couldn't really care less about such trivial things. There are also people who will get angry if you don't use the full LGBTQI abbreviation, but I'm happy with other more laid back terms like queer, which tends to cover everything anyway.

To kick things off I will start with a term that we use, but the people it refers to may not know what it means, or that it even exists. The term Cisgendered (or Cis for short) refers to people who identify as the sex they were born with, and until a few years ago I wasn't even aware of it. The purpose of this term is to move away from using "normal"to refer to everyone who isn't Trans, as this would suggest that all Trans people are abnormal or wrong. Using the term Cis is a step forward in accepting transgender people as normal rather than something outside of the general population.